Malec Fanfic

Chapter 26

Alec stood outside the door of the room that held Magnus and took a deep breath as he turned the handle, needing to see that man's face. The sight before him truly broke his heart. "Oh my god", Alec whispered as he approached the bed where Magnus lay, still unconscious. "You must be Mr. Lightwood", another doctor said as Alec approached the frail, broken man. "Y-yes", Alec stuttered, taking another deep breath as his heart rate increased. "Is he...is he going"—But Alec couldn't finish his sentence as he began to swell up. "Mr. Lightwood", she said, meeting Alec's eyes. "Magnus is going to pull through this time. We weren't sure there for a moment, but we were able to pump his stomach from the deadly amounts of alcohol as well as give him a medication which aids in cocaine overdose just in time". Alec was speechless, looking down at his beautiful love. "Wait...", Alec said, feeling very confused. "How do you know who I am?". "Well,", she replied with a warm smile. "You are listed as Magnus' primary emergency contact and the nurse let me know you would be stopping by", she continued, her face now falling into sorrow. "But I have to admit, I was quite saddened to see him like this again after all this time. He had been doing so much better and—"Wait", Alec said, his eyes darting up to meet hers. "What do you mean see him again? You mean he's...he's overdosed before?". "Oh Mr. Lightwood I'm so sorry! I assumed you knew. But yes. Several years ago he overdosed three times in six months and had multiple failed suicide attempts. He attended rehab and intensive psychotherapy, which seemed to have helped him for quite some time, but I suppose with everything that's been going on, he's fallen back into some of his old destructive behaviors. Alexander...he is really going to need your support if he's going to make it this time, just like he had last time", the doctor finished, setting down her notes.

"He should be waking up any minute now. I'll give you two some privacy. And don't be afraid to call if you need anything", she said as she left the room. "Thank you", was all Alec could think to say as the boyfriends were left alone. Alec pulled up a chair to the edge of the bed, staring at Magnus' profile as he thought about everything the doctor had just told him. He had more questions now than anything. Why hadn't he told Alec about his past overdoses? Who had helped him out that last time? What had pushed him over the edge this time? Why hadn't he come to Alec? Alec placed his head in his hands, rocking slightly as he tried to control his spiraling anxiety. Alec closed his eyes and took deep breaths, not able to stop the stinging in his eyes as several tears escaped them. "Alexander?", Magnus whispered, causing Alec's head to snap up and the tears to roll down his cheeks. "Wh-why are you crying?", Magnus asked, taking in his surroundings. "Are you serious?", Alec asked, allowing a bit of anger to come through his tone. "Look around you Magnus". Magnus did as he was told, finally understanding what was going on. "Fuck!", Magnus yelled, closing his eyes and tightening his fists. "What did I do this time?", Magnus asked, a small chuckle in his sentence. Alec stood up suddenly, now suddenly furious. "You think this is funny? You think me wondering if you were alive or dead for almost a hour is funny?! You think me finding your lifeless body lying face down in some random fucking bathroom is a joke?! "Alexander I"—But Alec wouldn't allow Magnus to speak as he finished his rant. "You think me giving you CPR and thinking you were going to die in my fucking arms is funny?! And that it's so hilarious how you not only gave yourself alcohol poisoning, but you overdosed on cocaine! And apparently not for the first time!" Alec finally finished yelling, breathing heavily as his anger subsided.

"Why didn't you come to me? Why didn't you let me help you? Why...just I don't...". "Alexander please come here", Magnus said, his face almost emotionless. Alec fell silent, slowly walking over to Magnus' side as he began to talk. "We will talk about all of this. And I will answer any question you have of me. But right now I just need to say that I'm sorry. The last thing I ever wanted to do was drag you into all of my shit and that's exactly what I did. Words cannot express how sorry I am that you had to go through all of that baby", Magnus almost whispered, his voice hitching as he tried not to cry. "Please sit down Alexander. I need to say one more thing". Alec reluctantly followed his boyfriend's request, sitting down slowly so that the two men's faces were very close. "Can I...can I have your hand Alexander?", Magnus asked through his sadness. Alec pursed his lips, but gave up on resistance quickly, knowing he wouldn't be able to deny the man. Alec lifted his hand to Magnus', grabbing onto the warm skin of each other's palms. "I also need to say thank you. It sounds like you went through a lot to find me and help me and I bet it was scary and traumatizing. But thank you for caring enough about me to...", but Magnus couldn't finish his sentence as he began to sob. "You- you saved my life Alexander I...". "Shhhh...", Alec said, now worried that Magnus was getting too worked up. "Magnus calm down. Please!", Alec begged as he leaned closer to his boyfriend, using his other hand to stroke that man's forehead. After several moments of Alec's soft kisses on his cheeks and his gentle fingers through his hair, Magnus' breathing returned to normal. "You need to rest your heart", Alec whispered into Magnus' ear, leaving a warm kiss on his temple. "Alexander. After everything I put you through, you still want to take care of me?", Magnus asked, looking straight into Alec's emotion-filled eyes. "Yes", Alec whispered in reply. "I love you", Alec stated like it was obvious.

"We're going to figure this out, Magnus. We're going to do whatever it takes. I felt what it was like to think you were gone and...I won't do it again. Magnus this is going to need to change. You understand that right? I can't go through that again", Alec said seriously. "I-I understand Alexander". "I love you. I love you more than anything in this world, but we're going to have to be in this together". "Yes Alec", Magnus agreed, gripping the side of Alec's face. "This is not something I plan on making a pattern, ok? I won't let this happen again. I promise", Magnus whispered as he brought Alec's forehead to his own. "Don't leave me baby", Magnus whispered in fear, fear that Alec was slipping away. "Hey, hey, hey", Alec replied, grabbing onto either side of Magnus' face. "I'm here, Magnus. You say you are willing to work on this and I trust you, ok? I'm not going anywhere", Alec replied, his tone so full of care and compassion. "I love you so much Alec", Magnus replied before he reached out and pulled Alec's head down for a kiss. This kiss was full of promises, of relief, of passion, and of love. Always love. "You are the best part of me, Alexander", Magnus whispered as the kiss ended.